Non-Threatening Behavior

Talking and acting so that your partner feels safe and comfortable doing and saying things.

Respect

Listening to your partner non-judgmentally.
Being emotionally affirming and understanding.
Valuing opinions.

Trust and Support

Accepting responsibility for self.
Acknowledging past use of violence and or emotionally abusive behavior, changing the behavior.
Acknowledging infidelity, change the behavior.
Admitting being wrong, when appropriate.
Communicating openly and truthfully, acknowledging past abuse, seeking help for abusive relationship patterns.

Shared Responsibility

Mutually agreeing on a fair distribution of work.
Making family decisions together.

1. What will I absolutely not tolerate even if every other person on this planet turned their back on me?
2. What actions or words make me feel really uncomfortable?
3. What actions, words or my own thoughts can I rid that will improve my life?

Boundaries are placed by us to protect our individuality and keep us feeling joy in our lives.  Boundaries are for our emotional, physical and spiritual well-being.  They give us self confidence, improved self-esteem and come from a place of empowerment and self-love.

Growing up with a Narcissist parent basically had given me the illusion that I didn't have a right to my own thoughts, feelings and preferences.  My only duty was to give attention and supply which led my true self to go on silent and allow inappropriate, outlandish, abusive words and actions into my space.

THESE ARE SOME OF MY PERSONAL BOUNDARIES

• I only allow others to speak respectfully towards me.  If I perceive that someone is speaking disrespectfully, I will stand up for myself and tell them that I don’t appreciate the way that they are speaking to me and if they want to communicate, it needs to be respectful.
• I only allow men that I have got to know and develop a friendship and intimacy with in my personal and physical space.  For example, depending on the situation I may allow a kiss on the first or second date, but I will not tolerate him putting his hands all over me in an aggressive way.
  
• I only allow my partner to be sexual with me, meaning I need to be in a committed relationship before sexual contact is made.  In order for me to be in a committed relationship I need to feel my partner is an emotionally, physically and spirituality present man and feel we are truly friends who respect and enjoy being together.
• I only allow people in my life who take responsibility for themselves.  I only allow people I trust to borrow money if it is a true emergency which I have good discernment about.  I no longer feel obligated to continue on with relationships that are not serving my highest good in terms of not wanting to hurt the other person’s feelings. 
• I will only allow advice from others that I know have my best interests at heart. These are people that I respect and know are healthy.  I attract people who only give advice when asked and are supportive of my decisions, goals and visions.
  
  

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